The Fun is in the Journey

I am driving along the transcanada in the majestical Rocky Mountains for the thousanth time. Everytime I do I find yet another Jewel.

I left at 4:00 am from Calgary destined for the Okangan by 9:30 am. The first time I drove this route by myself this early my 10 year old son was an infant now my 7 year old daughter is asleep in the back seat. She'll wake up just as we arrive and the 6 hour trip will seem like minutes to her.

Since we're moving to the west coast this will be my last trip. I zip past rest stops and towns I've stopped at in the past ans wonder if other Calgarians on their way to their Okanagan or Shuswap destination have taken a moment to enjoy the journey. Some places I've stopped to stretch, like Feader Lake, surprise me with kids playgrounds and quiet scenic benches. Some stops to grab a snack, like field, are filled with history and photo ops. Most though have been a historical educational walks for my children as they see, touch, and learn about the building of the railway in the BC Rockies.

One of my favorite pictures is of my son at 1 1/2 years old. We'd stopped at the Rogers Pass Petro Canada for a pee break (for me) and through sheer curiosity took a walk along the deserted rail track. An easy walk through the forest has plaques that tell the story of men who lost their lives trying to build a section of the railway. At the end of the journey is the Rogers Pass summit marker.

There are so many places along this section of the TransCanada Highway that relay the past history many only get to read about in History Books. How many Alberta and BC families have flown by in their cars, timing themselves to see how fast they could get to their destination.

Some stops have been planned, our time at the natural bridge in field. Some stops out of necessity like the little access roads off the. Main highway for a private urgent bathroom break. Some to cool off from the summer heat because our car didn't have a/c. Since I was born here and have driven this stretch of highway so many times the awe of it is lost on me. For those who have traveled here and taken the time to visit every part of this beautiful majestic mountain region and have seen the work of God, you are the fortunate ones because many who live here zip by on their way to somewhere else.

Onset of Puberty

I thought I had a few more years before I had to deal with pimples and body odor but my 10 year old son woke up this morning with a pus pot of a zit.

I was talking to my friend the other day about puberty and she mentioned she'd bought some books for her daughter to read. Don't get me wrong, I'm an avid reader and love books but I want my kids to talk to me and be open about what's going on with them. Although, I will use books as a tool I am developing an open dialogue with him too.

I started talking to him about his body at a very early age. At night I'd ask him questions about his private parts and who was allowed to touch them. He was uncomfortable at first but I kept the tone light and we'd joke about how he was different from his sister and why his pee looked different from his dad's.

I wouldn't get technical or tell him the bird's and bee's. He know's there is something called sex from the TV but he doesn't know what it is. After all he's only 10.

By asking light questions and giving him age appropriate info about his body in different non technical ways has enabled a strong line of communication to develop. Whether he will pick up his end of the line when he has questions or issues is yet to be seen.

Twice Exceptional

Being a parent is full of stresses, just when you think you have it all figured out you get a phone call. My son's schools have tested and labelled him twice exceptional. Labels, I had hoped my son would be average, even when it was very apparent that he wasn't, I didn't want him to be labelled. He hates being different and wants to be the same as everyone else. I can't blame him, isn't that what anyone wants, to be just like their friends.

When I got the call from my son's resource teacher with the latest test results I was filled with both extreme pride and foreboding. My grade 4 son, my baby, has completed grade 10 for reading ability and grade 8 for comprehension. Any parent would be thrilled to get such a call but it fills me with a feeling a can't explain. Of course I'm proud, but there is this worry, fear, and stress that won't leave the pit of my stomach.

I'm not a neurotic parent, far from it. I don't visit doctors offices at the sign of a sniffle or the emergency room for every scrap or fall. I'm a firm believer in natural consequence, responsibility for choices, and figuring things out for themselves. I don't get rattled easily, I pride myself on handleing any issue that comes my way - but everytime I talk to his school I worry that he will not meet his potential and its my fault.

Working full time again has taken my focus away from my kids. Mothers always feel guilty, I mean isn't that a measuring stick of how good a mother you are? Working mothers have the added guilt of not being there all the time. This is probably the source of this feeling in the pit of my stomach the nagging voice saying I'm not good enough, I'm failing my son.

Can't remember the title of a book and the author isn't who I thought

It is so frustrating, you know when you can't remember something. I read a novel once about a women who's husband died when his yacht blew up. A year later a psychic shows up with a message from her dead husband. Someone murdered him and now is trying to kill her. She discovers her husband isn't who she thought he was. They don't have kids. In the end the whole thing has to do with money and his mistress the psychic. I thought the book was written by Joy Fielding but it isn't listed on her site.

If you have any suggestions as to the writer or the book title please let me know!! It's drivin me crazy.

Cadbury Buying Bikes for Africa and Fair Trade Coca Beans

Last night I saw Cadbury's TV ad telling the world they will buy a bike for someone in Africa if we buy their chocolate and enter the USP code. I thought of two things when I saw it: 1. They buy coca beans in the market where 40% comes from farms with child slavery. 2. The USP code is a great marketing tool to start an interaction with consumers - but what about the chocolate bar consumers that don't enter the USP code online?

Cadbury has promised to manufacture a chocolate bar that is made with free trade products. This is a much more important initiative for Africa then a bike. By purchasing coca beans that are grown on farms with NO child labour at a fair price the African people can have a better quality of life.

Since we don't buy non fair trade chocolate bars anymore, I am looking forward to Cadbury's free trade chocolate bars.

Cadbury's free trade chocolate

Can we Do Anything for the Lost Children?

Whether we spend money to see movies like, Blood Diamond, Lord of War, and SlumDog Millionaire or we watch CNN or read articles in Time we know what is going on in the world. We know about the atrocities that children of civil war, refugee camps, and slums face every day and we do nothing.

I am reading a long way gone: memoirs of a boy soldier by ishmael beah and feel fortunate that he has the courage to tell his story. I have been honoured by a former refugee of Somalia and another of Kosovo when they told me their heart wrenching stories.

Stories that were hard to tell, stories that cause nightmares and would rather be forgotten. I am very thankful to those that have taken the time to sit down with me and relate them to me. I feel very fortunate to have known these people and to know their courage and how they helped others to get through it. Although I rarely have crossed their paths again, I consider them people I will always consider heros.

They are heros, not because of what they indured, but because of what they choose to do during that time. How they helped others, lead others, or helped others understand.

I do what I can to help - send money to those in the front lines making a difference. Is it enough?

Child Slavery - Girls are most Vulnerable

In most poverty stricken countries parents sell their children into slavery. Sometimes they are tricked with the promise that they are sending their children to work as domestic help. Sometimes though they know their daughters are going to brothels and the money is worth more to them.

The Child Slavery story by Time journalists Alex Perry and Jonathan Taylor tells about how parents profit from their daughters work in brothels.

I can't imagine for the life of me what it would be like to sell my daughter, let alone into a life of prostitution. Do these parents weep? Do they regret? Do they think about their daughters? Do they even care? I could not continue to live knowing my daughter was in pain let alone if I put her there.

For years I have sent money to either World Vision or Foster Parents Plan. When I was young my parents sent money to World Vision. Has it made a dent? Does any of the money help out? It sounds like things are only getting worse regardless of these types of organizations.

Is there a solution? Probably not an easy one because any solution would mean those with money would have to think of others and care about the faceless poor.

Chocolate and Child Slavery
Child Slavery in Modern Day America and other Industrialized Nations

Disabled Children Sold into Slavery

Chocolate and Child Slavery - Time to give up Chocolate

I love chocolate, who doesn't? Everything tastes better with chocolate right! The Ivory Coast in Africa uses child slavery to produce cocoa beans. By buying chocolate I feel like I'm supporting child slavery so no more chocolate.

Fair trade chocolate is OK to eat but if it doesn't say fair trade you don't know where it comes from.

Child Slavery in Modern Day America and Canada

Chocolate and Child Slavery


BBC News report on Child Slavery in Western Africa

ABC News Photo Journalism Story of a Life of a Child Slave

Defining the roles of siblings to foster friendship

When I was pregnant with my daughter I defined my son's role as a big brother for him. As we talked about what it meant to be a big brother he made the role his and took it very seriously. As a big brother he was very concerned about her happiness and her safety.

As my daughter grew up it became very clear that she was getting the better deal so I defined her role as a little sister and made her just as responsible for her big brother as he was for her.

By defining their roles and having them participate in the discussion they took full ownership of their roles in the family. They have become very close and are good friends.

Modern Day Slavery in Industrialized Nations like America and Canada

I knew about the sex trade and how it was enslaving women, but I hadn't heard about child slavery in homes for domestic services. I was watching a Law and Order episode about child slavery and thought that it was so far fetched I googled it. I was surprised to find out how big of a problem it is in America and Canada. So my question is, what kind of people would bring a child into their home and force them to be a slave?

Links to news and articles:

ABC News Article
Newspaper Article
What is being done
Anti Slavery
Story of child domestic slavery
Child Maid

Why I will no longer eat chocolate

Every Mother of Young Children needs an IPOD with Noise Cancelling EarPhones

My kids have friends over and the weather outside is too cold to send them outside. The volume in the house and the absolute silliness is getting on my nerves. so I put my ipod on and my stress level decreased immediately.

So if you know a new mom and you're wondering what she needs, really good earplugs or earphones for an IPOD.

What if You Accidently Married Your Brother or Sister?

What if you accidently married your brother or sister? Is it possible to accidently fall in love, marry and have children with your brother or sister?

Free love, one night stands, and a rise in fatherless children. Hey anything can happen now adays.

Just a thought!

My Son Won't Focus Resulting in Forgetfulness

He is a really bright kid, problem is he is so forgetful because he doesn't focus or pay attention to anything. It is getting to be a bigger problem and it's driving my husband nuts. My son will write that he has tests in his agenda but won't bring home the study material or he'll forget the homework assignments at school.

Bedtime routines and morning routines are a constant remind remind remind to the point of stressing everyone out. So I finally made large lists of what they need before they leave the house, lunch, homework, backpack, coat, boots, mitts, (even coat and boots will be forgotten as he leaves the house.) While I was at it I made lists for what to do when he gets home, goes to bed, gets up in the morning and a very large one for my daughter reminding her to wash her hands in the bathroom.

I am going to leave them up for 8 weeks and see if that will help him create habits that will last a lifetime. I'm hoping by having the checklist in front of his face we won't be constantly at him reminding him of basic things.

Any other ideas would be appreciated.