Some People's Kids -- I'd Be Pissed at Mine if They Posted Like These

The kids and I went to check out their great aunt's myspace page to listen to some of her music and were surprised to find some music videos. One of their favorite songs from last night's August performance was "Mad at Myself." We've watched it a few times now.

Mad at Myself

Linda Kidder MySpace Music Videos

After watching the video I thought I'd read some of the comments that people have left. Some teeny bopper's thought it was 'gay.' - OK, I can see that, after all, they have yet to experience the things that happen during this song. Other teens though were outright rude and mean. Thing is - kids, don't forget your parents can see what you write! If I catch my kids swearing off and being rude and mean online they will loose more then Internet privileges.

The biggest problem with children, teenagers in particular, and the Internet is the parents lack of interest in how they talk to others online. Perhaps how they talk to others offline too. I am sick of listening to adults complain about how today's teenagers have 'no respect,' talk back, are rude, violent, or whatever negative complaint they have. The issue is deeper then that, it starts at the home and goes out into the community from there.

We could blame working mothers for not having enough time or energy for their children. We could blame stay at home mothers for smoothering and indulging their children. We could blame TV shows, video games, liberal laws, friends, and too much money. Pointing and placing blame isn't going to solve the issue. Solutions, we are in need of solutions to help straighten out some of the delinquents that are coming out of high school and into the real world.

I am not looking forward to my children's teen years. I will be monitoring their online lives, and those of their friends to use what I find to open communication about what their actions could mean in the future.

For those children in our socio-economic circle I'd say "Consequences people", that's one part of the solution, consequences, there has to be consequences and we have to love our children enough to let them feel the full force of those consequences. It's easy when they are young, hard when they are older and the consequences are life altering. So start young, let your young children make decisions for themselves and experience the consequences of those decisions, it will teach them in baby steps how to make better decisions when it matters.

Communication is the key to shaping our children to be quality community minded people. Helping them think for themselves by asking open ended questions and listening to what they come up with as solutions. Asking questions that place them in others shoes and understanding how their behavior effects other people. Talking to kids about their day, their friends, and the challenges they face. Taking time to have one on one time to get to know your child is part of the solution.

I can't change the world, I can't make disrespectful teenagers be respectful, I can't stop adults that do nothing but complain and condemn others. What I can do is change the way I act and ensure my children become healthy contributors to society. I do this through communication, consequences, by example, and most importantly love.

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