On Average Canadians spent 10% of their income on food - If that is true then our family is below average. On average we spend approx 27% of our household income on groceries and the weekly bill keeps rising. As a single income household in the Greater Vancouver area, it isn't easy to make ends meet at the best of times, but with the cost of essentials: food, gas, & housing, rising it is even harder.
In order to make ends meet I've started making our bread because store prices are just too expensive. We've stopped purchasing granola bars, processed foods, lunch snacks, and I've started baking as much as possible. I've been comparison shopping between Costco, Walmart, Safeway, and Save On just to make sure I'm spending the least amount possible on items. I've even started over the border shopping into Bellingham, WA where dairy, chicken, and some gas prices are lower than in Canada. I don't like to take my shopping support into the States but what am I to do when the difference is over 50% less for the same items? I've even become a butcher as large bulk roasts from Costco are cheaper than the ones already cut.
We are lucky because by cutting back we are able to make ends meet and hopefully I'll find employment soon and then our household income will nearly double. However, in most of the world this is not the case. Where people spend 80% of their household income on food, rising food prices will only make it harder to survive starvation.
In Canada we choose to ignore those that are starving and continue to live our lives consuming. After all, the one with the most toys wins - right. I am just as guilty as anyone else, whenever we have a few extra hundred dollars we buy something for our kids, our house, or ourselves. Our kid's birthday present could have fed a family in a third world country for years. Sometimes I wonder what are we teaching our children. Can our children afford to be bigger consumers than us? Will they end up in worse debt? or will they become generous giving individuals who are thankful for what they have and give to those with less?
What are some ideas to help teach our children to be more thoughtful, less selfish, and smaller consumers?
How are you cutting your grocery bill to save money?
Rising Cost of Food - Is it cutting into your Budget?
Getting Older .... Cutting the Strings is so Hard
My son is getting older and it is so frustrating because I am having a hard time with the distance he's putting between us. I am beginning to understand how obsolete technology must feel. I know he doesn't mean to be mean but it still hurts just the same when he tells me he doesn't need me anymore.
I look at him and see a young man where a boy used to be. I wonder where all the time went and why I didn't hang on to every second of every moment with him. I was distracted at times by work, friends, TV, books, and the internet while he was growing up. I remember his baby years better than the last 5 years, his primary school years where friends grew more important than mom. I long for those wonderful years when I was the only person in his world.
Then I think about all the wonderful conversations we've had over the last year and all the indepth thoughts he has shared with me. Every year has brought something new something different as he grows into his own. I want to be with him sharing every minute of his life, but that is not alright. I need to let him go and be with friends, develop social circles of his own along with thoughts and beliefs that are his. Soon I will have to let him go to spend time with a special girl that is not me and that I know will be hardest of all.
Its hard not to feel less and less needed by my children. Sometimes I wonder if they really need me around at all, should I just leave and let them be? Sometimes I wonder if they love me anymore because they are so busy with their lives they forget me. That is the hardest part about letting out the apron strings, realizing that just because they aren't as close doesn't mean they don't need or love me less.
I know that my children still need me, just less than they did before, and I will have to find something else to fill that hole in myself. All those distractions that take my focus off my kids are what keep me sane and allow me to be there for them when they need me. The trick is to be able to turn off the distraction and focus on them.
Should Kids Play with Kids Older than Them?
My friend's daughter, who is 8, is spending a lot of time with girls who are 12 years old. She's torn about how to handle the situation.
In one respect her little girl is getting a boost to her self esteem because the older girls keep complimenting her and teach her new cheer leading moves. On the other hand she is neglecting friends her age and hurting her relationships with her peers.
I had a similar situation with my son earlier this year when he was hanging out with a boy 5 years older. It was much easier for me to say that they couldn't hang out because they didn't go to school together. Its harder for my friend because her daughter is at the same school as her older friends and plays with them every chance she can. By ignoring her peers on the playground in favor of older friends she is damaging her friendships with peers. For example my daughter thought they weren't friends anymore because she (the 8 yr old) was always running off to find her older friends.
I can understand how cool it feels for a younger child when older kids pay attention to them. However, its not good for younger children to always be with children years older than them. Older children are going through things younger children can't comprehend, nor should they. Can children form real friendships with children 4-5 years older than them? As siblings possibly over time but as school mates, I'm not so sure.
In Calgary the schools are divided more then the schools in BC. In Calgary my children couldn't go to the same school because of the way they are divided: Grade K-4, 5-7, 8-10, and 11-12. In BC they are in the same school: Grade K-7, 8-12. I don't like the way younger kids are put onto the playground with older kids and I certainly don't like it when grade 8 girls are hanging around grade 12 boys.
In my girlfriend's case I can see how this friendship gives her little girl confidence but I believe it should be monitored and limited so that better friendships with peers have a chance to grow.
Recurring Nightmare ... Missing Daughter
I keep having a nightmare that my daughter is missing. I felt the absolute grief and emptiness while I searched for her. Every time I pictured her face I'd lose all sanity and an intense emptiness would envelope me, all I wanted was my baby girl. A little girl I'll never see again, even awake, because like every parent, I've lost my baby to time.
She is older and wants more freedom, freedom to walk to a friends house, freedom to ride her bike in the cul de sac out front, walk with her older brother to school. I utilize a walkie talkie to ensure I am with her at all times but even this isn't enough to quench my fears. When she walks to a friends house, all of a block away, I talk with her. I ask her if she sees strangers, I ask her if there are any cars, I ask her to describe either if she sees them. I instruct her to look around and identify any dangers she can and then help her steer clear of them. The great thing about the walkie talkie is that the volume on her end is so loud that everyone can hear what I'm saying to her. A stranger that is being described to someone may feel a little weird, but at least I know the description of the person she just passed.
When kids are small we keep a tight leash on them but as they grow the leash gets tight and they need more length or it will eventually break. Thanks to technology it easier to keep the leash tight but give it more slack at the same time.
My parents think I'm nuts sometimes, giving my kids technology that they deem as unnecessary, that is until they see the advantages. First it was the DVD player in the car.... why in the world would my kids need to watch tv in the car.... Oh I don't know maybe because I would drive 6 hours plus to visit them with the kids on my own. It's a lot safer to drive when they aren't bugging the hell out of you.
The next unnecessary item for my kids... a cell phone. At the moment the walkie talkies work because I am always in range. However, when I go back to work that won't always be the case and I can talk to them as they go to childcare facilities or if I'm running a little late and they have to go home on their own. (My son is babysitting age).
I'll never get my baby girl back. I miss constant cuddles, hugs, and kisses but I am enjoying the new relationship that is building between my daughter and myself. I know that the nightmares aren't real but I still wake up in a sweat longing for my baby.
Punishing my Son for What Friends Do
Kids can be mean, the playground is a tough place for a lot of kids. I am trying to teach my kids how to pick "good friends," and sometimes that means punishing them for their bad choices. When my son was young there was one incident where his friend was throwing rocks at a house while my son stood and watched. When our neighbour informed us of this transgression I quickly grounded my son for a week, his friend was not punished. Try explaining how that is fair to a little boy.
No matter what we do though he continues to stand by and watch as friends make stupid decisions or bully other kids. He knows its wrong, he feels bad when we talk about it, but he does nothing to remove himself from the situation, he doesn`t correct his friends or stand up for others. He just stands there and does nothing. Not the action I am looking for.
What he doesn`t understand and refuses to believe is that his friends will stop what they are doing if he leaves the area, if they are the types of kids to be friends with. If not then find new friends. It`s not like his friends are bullies or criminal, they just get wound up sometimes as boys do and don`t think about what they are doing at the time.
My son has picked some really great kids to be friends with and they sometimes feed off each others energy and the next thing you know someone has done something stupid. For 11 year olds stupid can be as innocent as running over a neighbours lawn or not making a new kid feel welcome. What I want is to ensure is that if my son knows what is going on is wrong or stupid to walk away, not to be involved. However at the time he doesn`t think, he gets wound up by their energy and cuts through private property or hurts a new friend`s feelings. It happens, I just want him to realize that their are consequences when he does it.
Spending Time with the Kids - Remember What's Important in Life
My husband was fortunate enough to get some time off at work to make it to our daughter's Christmas performance and then go skating with her at her skating lesson Christmas party. My husband isn't the overly happy type, life is always bearing down on him and he sometimes gets so bogged down he forgets to stop and spend time with the kids. Recently he took the time to build snowmen and have a snowball fight with the kids and soon 15 minutes turned into the whole afternoon. It had been a long time since I'd seen him so happy and relaxed, he finally realized that life would always be there, but the kids wouldn't.
We are fortunate to live in Canada, but we don't always feel that way. When you have everything and nothing but time on your hands its so easy to look around for things to complain about. We don't appreciate the little things because the little things are common place for us. We are so focused on what we don't have, we have forgotten to appreciate what we do have. We are so obsessed with what we perceive others have, we forget that they have problems too.
We get so busy trying to maintain our lifestyle, or make our way up the social ladder we forget that what we have is most precious. Ever look at a family or a couple and think, 'wow they sure have it all figured out, life has sure been good to them.' 'Why aren't we like them? Why does life dump on us and shine so bright on others?'
Sometimes I think we should be happy and content with our lot in life. After all, we have it better then 90% of the world. My husband is employable, our kids are amazing, we are healthy, and have money in the bank just waiting to buy a house. What more could we want? Why do we allow things to pull us down into a mental rut? Can we find joy in paying bills? Can we enjoy housework? My husband can get so focused on everything that needs to be done, those things that weigh on his mind, he misses out on so much joy. Specifically, he misses out on spending fun time with the kids. Sometimes they are the only thing that can bring us joy when the tedious parts of life are getting too much.
Can we ever get off the hamster wheel? Everyday he heads out to work doing the same thing he hates to do day in and day out. Everyday I clean the house, do laundry, do stuff for the kids, and my to do list continues to grow. There is always something to do, bills always come in the mail, work is always there, kids always need to be fed. However, life is what we choose it to be, it can be the dreary drudgery of the day to day rut we find ourselves in or it can be joyous, it all depends on what we focus on. Making time with the kids a daily event will help keep us happy and remind us why we work so hard the rest of the time.
Careful What You Wish For
They were quietly playing in their bedroom, not a peep came out of their mouths. It was peaceful and all of a sudden I missed them and wanted them to come into the living room to spend time with me.... What was I thinking?
How can children at one moment be wonderful and at the next so annoying you want to throttle someone?
Don't get me wrong, they are great kids, but they love to repeat themselves over and over and over again. One minute they are quiet and the next its as if they are hyped up on halloween candy and everything is chaotic. I should have left good enough alone and enjoyed the quiet.
Keeping Kids Safe Online by Educating Them
The "experts" on the subject of keeping kids safe Online instruct parents to protect their kids by ensuring no one can access their kids. Sounds simple enough right, well I disagree with this method because you can't ensure that no one will ever access your children's information or them. It is safer to start young and educate them in baby steps about information, the Internet, and email instead of doing it for them.
Many parents have been to courses that instruct them to keep their contact information close and not to hand it out to anyone. They shouldn't let their kids have email addresses or have their name on any contact list. They should make sure their computers have parental blocks that keep kids from going to unapproved sites. They should manage their children's information for them and make decisions about what websites to visit.
The question is, are parents really protecting their kids by hiding from the world?
I don't subscribe to the whole hide away in order to protect. I allow my kids to have their own email addresses and phone numbers, does this mean I'm putting my kids at risk? I don't think so. My kids are still young enough that I have control over what they do. I use these tools to talk about what is appropriate and what is not, we talk about what information to put out into virtual world and what information to alter or hide. I allow them to practice these skills in the open (no computer in their room) and help them make safe decisions.
I ask them questions to ascertain what they think, what they know and problem solve for the best decisions. Instead of just making rules, I bring them into the decision making process to help them understand why they need to do certain things.
Before they could read, approved websites were saved in their favorites and they could click to get to them easily. As the grew older and began using search engines like Google we discussed what keywords to use and how to protect their information. My kids know not to use their real birthdays, addresses, or names. They have chosen safe birthdays, addresses, and names to use instead. They know why they can't use this information and what could happen if they do.
You tube is a big issue in our house because my son thinks its the best site and his friends send him links. There are some things on You Tube that are not appropriate for him to watch. We have talked to him about what he thinks is appropriate, what key words does he think he should avoid and a few others we deem inappropriate. We tell him why we don't want him looking at videos that are violent, have fighting, or are hateful. I use stories that I've heard about and ask him what he thinks about the story and how it effects what he does online.
We have some rules that are not up for discussion. Before he presses play he needs to read the title, the comments, and based on certain words determine if its is appropriate. The big rule when it comes to You Tube - he has to crank the volume so we can hear what he's watching. The computer is in the main living area so he can't sneak so easily, if he sneaks then he looses privileges. If his emails are inappropriate then he looses the email. He is learning what is appropriate by doing not being told or hidden away.
We also are made aware what friends are passing on links and information that is not appropriate and we can then act accordingly with that child. Once again our son is made apart of the decision process so he can learn how to choose friends.
They are still too young for facebook, myspace, and other social networking sites. But as they grow they will have the basics on how to protect themselves online and will have been practicing certain behaviors long before they are teenagers and I have little control over what they do.
I don't know, maybe protecting yourself by hiding your contact information and living in a bubble will keep kids safe. I doubt it because at some point they will want to have an email, have friends call them, and go out into the world. If they haven't made decisions or learned by baby steps over time how to protect themselves how can we expect them to know at 16, 18, 20?
Sibling Halloween Costumes
Since they've both been old enough to choose their costumes they have been similar characters. This year is no different, grim reapers. No princesses or fairies in our household, well at least I don't have to worry about skimpy costumes.
Last year it was Darth Vader and a Storm Trooper. I searched everywhere for the Darth Vader helmet and thankfully a friend had one. I think this was my favorite halloween costume duo. It just worked!
Relocating and Personality Change in my 10 Year Old Boy
I am a bad mother, at least I feel like one. Every good mother at one time or another feels that choices she has made are the wrong ones, resulting in devastation for her children. Uprooting the family and transporting them to Vancouver, BC just before my son entered grade 5 is one of those times. Had we moved just one year earlier then things would have been easier for him. Grade 5 is that time when children start caring about friends, brand names, and fitting in. My son's fears about making new friends and not fitting in has made this glaringly clear, so much so I feel like I am a bad mother.
My 10 year old son, my precious baby, is very outgoing, extremely extroverted and makes friends easily. His personality is usually a magnet to other boys who constantly find themselves at our doorstep. It is not unusual for him to bring home a new friend he met at the park or just outside our door. It's his energy, his sense of humour, and his attitude that attract many different types of boys to orbit around him waiting for his attention. At times he gets overwhelmed and shuts the door for alone time to recharge his batteries from the drain of others demands. This is why I didn't worry about him when we decided to move.
This summer there was a change in him, he became worried about fitting in, what others thought about him, carrying about brand names and interests. He began to hide his magnetic personality behind a facade of a cool standoffish personality. He started to emulate what he thought "cool" boys are and then was upset when he didn't make new friends right away. He seemed to be uncomfortable in his own skin and unsure of every decision, every thought, and of his real "self". It was heart breaking to watch, I just wanted to grab him and crack this new shell into a million pieces so my happy go lucky boy would come back to me.
Every walk resulted in distance between us, especially if other kids were around as he retreated further into his new "cool" personality. I would watch him look at other kids, scared that he wouldn't measure up, afraid to approach them, and looking so stiff. It broke my heart, I wanted to gather him up in a hug and make it all go away, but of course that would have only made things worse for him. I felt him falling away from me building more and more walls that I couldn't get through, resulting in a lonley place for him - isolated behind what he thought would be "cool" behavior.
I broke through on one such occasion when we were hurrying into the school for a meeting and I didn't have the patience for his slow "cool" pace to put more distance between us. I was getting angry and had enough of his attitude but instead of freaking out on him I wanted to distance myself from him. I turned, looked at him and loudly stated, "on the way home we'll swing by the mother exchange center and you can get a new mom that your not embarrassed of but for now move it." He laughed, he actually laughed and caught up to me and said, "I don't want a new mommy, I love my mommy." I'm not sure why this worked but it did.
It has taken time but he's making friends at school, in activities, and at the local rec center. He still isn't the same boy who left Calgary, AB, but he's more himself lately. I can only hope that this experience will help him love his real "self" and he'll understand how wonderful he is and this "cool" attitude will be a thing of the past. I realize he is growing up and that part of the process is to grow away from me, that's the hardest part for me, watching my baby distance himself from me for the perceived benefit of other kids. God give me patience and help me to be there for him when he needs me and to give him space when he doesn't.
Talking about Other Religions with Your Kids
My children will be making friends with kids from other cultures. In Calgary, their friends were either Catholic, Christian, or Mormon. In the Lower Mainland, they will be exposed to so many more religions. I want to understand the basics of each culture so that I can open lines of communication with my kids regarding what they believe.
We are Christian and I want my children to have a very strong faith in God but at the same time be tolerant of other religious groups. I realize that at some point they will start defining their own faith and I want to ensure that it remains Christian.
In Calgary our neighbours were Catholic and Mormon. The Catholic wasn't a huge issue, in fact my son went to Catholic Public School last year and I really loved the religious aspect of the school. Before he went to the school we talked about the differences between our beliefs. My son's Catholic friends weren't overly knowledgeable about their beliefs and since both religions are so similar it wasn't a huge deal. But when it came to my son's Mormon friends.....
Mormon children are very educated about their beliefs. My children, at a very young age, were told by their Mormon friend that I was going to die because I drink coffee. The same child told me that my husband and I weren't going to be together in the after life because we weren't married in the Temple. That's the good news, the bad is that I wasn't sure my kids would differentiate the difference between life and after life. So my sensitive highly intelligent son was worried that I was going to die and my marriage was going to end.
As my son gets older he says less and keeps more thoughts to himself. I don't know all his friends anymore and he has more play dates in their homes. If I can open the doors of communication by talking about the different religious beliefs then I can keep a finger on his religious pulse. The way I see it I have a choice, talk about all the options with my kids or put my head in the sand thinking they are only going to consider Christianity.
Onset of Puberty
I thought I had a few more years before I had to deal with pimples and body odor but my 10 year old son woke up this morning with a pus pot of a zit.
I was talking to my friend the other day about puberty and she mentioned she'd bought some books for her daughter to read. Don't get me wrong, I'm an avid reader and love books but I want my kids to talk to me and be open about what's going on with them. Although, I will use books as a tool I am developing an open dialogue with him too.
I started talking to him about his body at a very early age. At night I'd ask him questions about his private parts and who was allowed to touch them. He was uncomfortable at first but I kept the tone light and we'd joke about how he was different from his sister and why his pee looked different from his dad's.
I wouldn't get technical or tell him the bird's and bee's. He know's there is something called sex from the TV but he doesn't know what it is. After all he's only 10.
By asking light questions and giving him age appropriate info about his body in different non technical ways has enabled a strong line of communication to develop. Whether he will pick up his end of the line when he has questions or issues is yet to be seen.
Chocolate and Child Slavery - Time to give up Chocolate
I love chocolate, who doesn't? Everything tastes better with chocolate right! The Ivory Coast in Africa uses child slavery to produce cocoa beans. By buying chocolate I feel like I'm supporting child slavery so no more chocolate.
Fair trade chocolate is OK to eat but if it doesn't say fair trade you don't know where it comes from.
Child Slavery in Modern Day America and Canada
Chocolate and Child Slavery
BBC News report on Child Slavery in Western Africa
ABC News Photo Journalism Story of a Life of a Child Slave
Modern Day Slavery in Industrialized Nations like America and Canada
I knew about the sex trade and how it was enslaving women, but I hadn't heard about child slavery in homes for domestic services. I was watching a Law and Order episode about child slavery and thought that it was so far fetched I googled it. I was surprised to find out how big of a problem it is in America and Canada. So my question is, what kind of people would bring a child into their home and force them to be a slave?
Links to news and articles:
ABC News Article
Newspaper Article
What is being done
Anti Slavery
Story of child domestic slavery
Child Maid
Why I will no longer eat chocolate
Spending Too Much Time Behind the Camera Perserving Memories
Last night we went to the Airdrie Festival of Lights, which was cold and beautiful. It ended with a spectacular fireworks display and as I took pictures I realized something; I spend so much time looking through a camera to preserve memories I'm not apart of. Looking at something through the lens of a camera or a video camera removes you from experiencing that which you are trying to preserve.
How much time do we spend watching those videos that we spend so much energy taking? We take video to preserve memories that we won't have. By watching something through a camera you are removed from actually experiencing it and remembering the emotion of it. You are not engaged in the event you are trying to preserve so is it really a memory worth remembering?
Personally I love taking pictures they help trigger memories later on in life. I just have to stop trying to only take pictures and try to spend more time in the moment enjoying the situation I am trying to preserve forever. Next time your child has a school play try putting the camera in someone else's hands or a tripod and just enjoy the moment of watching your child perform. That memory will last in your mind and heart longer than any you preserved in video.
The Christmas Shoes Movie - A Lesson on What's Important in Life
I am watching The Christmas Shoes Movie and it is hitting home because it parrallels my life at present. It's a story about how life and work can get in the way of what's important - family. Life is so short, when my kids were born I started scrapbooks for them not only to remember their lives, but also so if something happened to me they would know how much I loved them. I filled it with my dreams for them and my heart, then I stopped because life got in the way.
God has given me a wake up call tonight with The Christmas Shoes Movie. I'm crying so much that I have a lake of tears at the base of my neck. The movie is about two families, one a successful lawyer is too busy making money and buying things that show his affluence. He misses his daughters school performance and has grown away from his wife whom he wants to start working so they can have a larger home.
The other family is also a single income family but the father owns a automotive shop that is struggling yet he is content with the mother staying home with their son. Their lives are intertwined without the lawyer realizing that the boy he helps buy a pair of shoes for his dying mother is his wife's friend that is dying. He is too occupied to see what is happening around him or to understand what his wife and daughter need.
This story has hit home for me and has strong parallels to my present life, God talks to us in very unusual ways sometimes. My husband owns an automotive shop that is struggling, I have a son the same age as the boy with the dying mother. My son is very thoughtful, empathetic, and sensitive to my feelings and happiness, just like the boy in the movie listens to what his mom needs.
I recently went back to work and have been very very focused on work, putting in long hours and travelling for weeks at a time. I sacrifice time with my family for my career, money and me time. When I was home for the better part of 6 years, I sacrificed my career, money and me time to be with my kids. I've missed parent teacher interviews, celebration of learning, and assembly presentations in the short time I've been back at work. This week I'm out of town and lost a day due to car trouble so I was debating on whether I should go back for my son's Christmas Concert Thursday night because I'd be missing another day of work on Friday.
I am ashamed of myself, but couldn't see what I was doing to my family because I wasn't there to see it. I'm not going to tell my son that I'm coming, I want to surprise him. I can't wait to see him as the ballet dancing sheep! It also means I'll be home for 2 whole weeks on vacation, I plan on spending as much time doing things like making puzzles, playing Barbies, playing Wii and snowboarding with them.
I also want to start up my scrapbooks again, to continue recording their lives and my love for them in the pages. Life is so short and if I'm not here to tell them how much I love them, how proud I am of them, and my dreams for them - I want the books to be able to tell them for me. I pray to God that I will be around to see my children grow and have children of their own. I pray to God as much as I can that he'd send angels to my children to surround them with their wings and protect them. I know I have no control over the future and what happens to us, I pray that whatever happens though my children will feel I put them first.
Christmas - What Happened? I've become a Scrooge
I used to go all out at Christmas, I'd buy the latest Christmas decor editions of magazines and start baking in November. I used to buy presents, go over my list again, return some for better ones. My house was decorated by December 1st with boxes upon boxes of decorations.
It's a week 'til Christmas break and I finally put up the tree, well the kids did I just helped a bit. There is no baking and the gifts were bought in one day and wrapped in one morning. There used to be a pile of presents, now only a few in comparison are placed under the tree. When it was only my son to buy for he had 3 times the gifts that the two of them have now.
Advent used to be a gift every night before bed, usually things like underwear, socks, a chocolate bar and small toy with one larger gift every Sunday. Now it's one of those $1.00 advent calendars you buy at WalMart.
There's snow outside, it's -30C and the whole neighbourhood is lit up, so why don't I feel the Christmas Spirit?
The biggest change for me was going back to work, I now don't have lots of extra time on my hands to prepare for an all out Christmas Blow Out. I have more money but less spirit. I am tired and pre occupied with work that the Christmas Spirit has flown the coup here. The kids are excited and can't wait but the house is space when it comes to decorations and my excitement has disappeared.
I wrapped all the gifts and placed them under the tree. I know their eyes will be big and their excitement will only increase, but I won't be here, I'll be off on a sales trip for the week returning on the weekend. I will have a few more gifts hopefully ready to place under the tree but the hassle of shopping for them will have taken all the joy out of it for me.
The malls here are so busy I can only conclude that someone forgot to tell Alberta there is a recession. Every weekend the malls are packed, even weekdays are so busy I'm grumpy. The malls here are always busy even in non Christmas shopping months that I wonder why the news continues to talk doom and gloom here, when obviously most of the residents are still spending money on a regular basis.
Why am I such a scrooge though? Did I use up all my Christmas cheer in the first few Christmas' my children will not even remember? Does making more money mean less cheer? Will my kids see a full blown out Christmas to remember again? I used to love Christmas, now it seems like one more to do on the to do list.
Why do People Choose to Become Soldiers
You know the recruitment slogan, "be all you can be." Commercials targeted at youth ask them to consider a life in the armed forces. Since I am sitting in my home safe and sound, watching the TV I couldn't help wonder, why young men and women decide to join the armed forces.
With an unpopular war being waged 1/2 way around the world, what compels a young adult to choose to go and fight?
As a mother, the idea of my child going to war, let alone volunteering, scares me. My children are young and concerned about social injustice, they hope they never have to go to war or anyone they love has to go to war. I can't imagine the worry, anxiety and stress a mother goes through when their child chooses to go into the military.
Don't get me wrong I think that making the choice to enter into the military is an Honorable choice, one to be proud of. I just don't understand it myself and I fear that one day my children may choose a life in a war zone.
What compels a young adult to put themselves through the vigerous training to then put themselves in harms way? The army doesn't pay danger pay so it can't be for the money. It has to be something more, something that most of the industrialized population lack and don't understand.
To those that do choose to take up the call "to be all you can be," THANK YOU. What you have choosen to do with your life is beyond your self and I hope that you will come through it safe and sound for the sake of your mothers. Many have died protecting their nation, fighting for what they believed to be the right cause and they gave the one thing that cannot be taken back, their lives. They are to be remembered, respected, and appreciated.
To the mothers.... Thank you for supporting your child's decision and standing behind them, even though I hope never to be in your shoes. I thank you for being a better person then me and filling those shoes.
War Movies Should Inspire Peace not be a Source of Enjoyment
Yesterday was Remembrance Day, one of the most important days in the year. My kids amaze me every year by their understanding of how terrible war is and yet so many are entertained by the movies war inspires.
I can't watch a war movie, classic or contemporary, without being touched by the sacrifice many made on my behalf. I have a hard time watching these types of movies and yet they make millions of dollars because society loves to watch them.
These movies should change the world to ensure that more young people don't die as a result of it. Yet men and women around the world are fighting different wars while we sit here watching, numb and detached from the realities of war.
My children fear that someone they know will have to go to war. My son especially is scared of the future and what war it will bring. We don't subject them to the news or any type of war movie or tv show. The only knowledge they have about the horrors of war come from Remembrance Day ceremonies and their imaginations.
Adults know more about the horrors of war and yet we don't hail our soldiers as heroes and many don't appreciate what they have sacrificed so we can enjoy freedoms and live the lives we do. War movies should be helping inspire empathy, gratitude, and peace not to enjoy watching how men and women suffered for our freedoms.
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